DİLARASAL KAOSTAN OLUŞAN KELİMELER

Not the examined, I wanted the one that imagined well. Flowers, with their rights to be seen as flowers. Night sky, with its right to be a night sky. Nothing more. No, humanity cannot do that, we want to see more than what we see. I do not know whether I am part of that ‘we’ anymore. I want to look at things without adding meanings. I want to be human, not beautiful or ugly. Not a poor or rich… Not successful or unsuccessful. Just a human. And I am a human if you ask the stars above. They wouldn’t know how to judge me with other things about me. I would be only a human. Their world is not the one that makes sense, because they do not need to make any sense. They exist without senses. Such a privilege, being excused from suffering. I am trying to understand myself, why I don’t like to be seen as beautiful first. The answer is becoming clear sometimes. Because deep in my heart I believe that being human should come first! I do not like the fact that people started to use ‘being beautiful...

You need people to heal from people. So ironic but true. The damage which is caused because of other people can be only healed by magic coming from others. You need other human beings to help you before you do the one last final push! Today I decided to understand what I want from this life, more than what it wants from me. If everything happens because of and for nothing, what I would like to get from this thing called life. Sense of solving the emptiness lies under all we do. For a second maybe we think that we get it whole, it feels so permanent and blank and true. Is it me thinking this or some words coming together from my imaginary box of words...

“The whole point of dying is to be scared; because that means that your life meant something to you.” The beginning. Do we even have an idea or acceptance about the beginning? No, we don’t. We don’t even know anything about the beginning, so how can we feel a peaceful acceptance about the ending of it? It is of course harder. Of course. This piece will be about endings. I was always scared of death. The very uncertainty about death, because I’ve never liked endings. But ironically, I always, always, constantly find myself thinking about death. The thought that life will be over, I will be over one day, and nothing won’t make any sense for anyone anymore... Nowadays I am trying to understand why I am this angry and sad about it, I’ve used to think like this because I think that it is not fair! It is not fair that we know the fact that we die one day! We are aware of the fact that we are going to die! This is what we do, or what happens to us. Such a burden for a human being, for...